Debbie Wiser

Mark,

I just re-read the notes from the seminar [the Workshop on Interpersonal Nonviolence]. I have needed some time to reflect on all we discussed–it was a very thought-provoking meeting.

Some of the ideas you discussed–to let go of outcome–were jarring to me as I realized how tightly I hold to needing certain outcomes. Other things you discussed–like the space between stimulus and response, the law of three and the emergence of a 4th dimension, the difference between state and stage, the need for loss/death to move to a new point–were all things that we talked about in Living School. However, you provide a clarity to those teachings that was very helpful. I felt like, in listening to you, I was hearing things again for the first time.

Thank you for that time–for the fun we had and the valuable information that was shared. I hope I can continue to hold to truth with less intensity and more compassion. I know I will be thinking about all you shared for a long time to come.

 

DS, female, age 34, Cincinnati, OH

I had the privilege to work with Mark recently for a whole day in a small group setting. I hope that my testimonial can do the experience justice.

First of all, Mark is an incredible teacher and facilitator. I already do quite a bit of self-development work, and yet I learned so much more about how I show up in life, including in conflicts, as well as have new tools for awareness in understanding how others show up too. Truly eye-opening. His wisdom, patience, and unique skills are such a gift. The presentation itself was fantastic and I learned a ton. As we workshopped, his ability to cut to the truth, in a gentle yet firm way, and walk us through it including action steps was remarkable.

This experience completely changed my perspective on myself, others and conflicts in general. To say that he “gave me new tools” is an understatement. He gave me a completely opened up perspective. What I learned in his class is something that will help me for the rest of my life. I would love to do more with Mark and highly recommend his work, no matter what stage you are in. He will meet you where you are with it and guide you. Even being in his presence, I knew I was working with someone very aware and “tuned in”. If you have an opportunity to work with him, go for it. You will come out of it changed, feeling more empowered with the new awareness and know-how, and more confident in handling difficult situations.

 

Leslie Hershberger

Sue and I were talking about the JustConflict workshop today and remarking at the ways it shifted some stuck places in our relationships with significant people in our lives. The insights from our team’s workshop continue to sink in. Many of us have talked of going home and applying the insights within 24 hours.

You have a way of being both challenging and gentle with participants. I also have great appreciation for the way you’ve fine-tuned this model through many years of practical experience in which you recognize that conflict is a gift that can not only deepen personal relationships, but can also shift stuck places in groups and organizations.  As a fellow Integral geek, I appreciated the practical application of the exquisite system in way that is clear and understandable to people.

I highly recommend this workshop to groups who will discover that not only is conflict inevitable, but it can also be a source of insight in learning about ourselves and honoring the different ways we move through our lives.

Deep bows of gratitude,

Leslie

 

Kathy Harlow

The JustConflict workshop was beneficial to me as it provides a structure to view the conflict from a new perspective of “What do I need” vs. “What do I want to change in my relationship or in my partner”.  When using this structure it becomes easier to focus on what elements are not present instead of arguments over whose unwanted behaviors are causing the problem.  Once the needs are clearly defined, this brings awareness for me to present different behaviors to the relationship that support an understanding of what I need, even if my partners behaviors do not change.

 

These next two statements are from persons who participated in the Retreat: The Practice of Presence

Dan Vrooman

The self that loves can be protected only if love is “redoubled.” It all starts with a sense of presence, with our creating what we need by changing ourselves, and that, by so doing; we also create what others need. And because I am more than my pattern of conflict, I may be able to embark upon a journey of reconciliation. This retreat provided me with the tools to build a suspension bridge anchored on one side with the death of the One for the reconciliation of all, and on the other the hope for the world to come as a world of love.

Clare Peiffer

I would recommend this retreat to anyone who is on the path of transformation. The focus on personal relationships in the JustConflict process revealed aspects of the false self to me that may have been difficult to bring to awareness otherwise. Working in the Family Groups was an opportunity to clarify the process and sort out the crux of the issues at hand. The time dedicated to prayer, silence and mindfulness training helped to keep me centered each day. Mark was masterful at uncovering the heart of the matter when helping to distill the issues present in life situations. By the end of the retreat I had not only a greater understanding of myself but tools that I could employ when I returned home. The beautiful setting and great food were a bonus!